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Janet I was feeling done in,
couldn't win.
I'd only ever kissed before.
Columbia You mean she...
Magenta Uh huh.
Janet I though there's no use getting
Into heavy petting.
It only leads to trouble
And seat wetting
Now all I want to know is how to go.
I've tasted blood and I want more.
Magenta & Columbia More, more,
more.
Janet I'll put up no resistance
I want to stay the distance
I've got an itch to scratch
I need assistance.
Toucha toucha toucha touch me!
I want to be dirty.
Thrill me chill me fulfill me!
Creature of the night.
Then if anything grows ,
while you pose,
I'll oil you up and rub you down.
Magenta & Columbia Down, down, down.
Janet And that's just one small fraction
of the main attraction
You need a friendly hand
and I need action.
Toucha toucha toucha touch me!
I want to be dirty.
Thrill me chill me fulfill me!
Creature of the night.
Columbia Toucha toucha toucha touch me!
Magenta I want to be dirty.
Columbia Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me!
Magenta Creature of the night.
Janet Toucha toucha toucha touch me!
I want to be dirty.
Thrill me chill me fulfill me!
Creature of the night.
Rocky Creature of the night.
Brad Creature of the night?
Frank Creature of the night.
Magenta Creature of the night.
Riff Raff Creature of the night.
Columbia Creature of the night.
Rocky Creature of the night.
Janet Creature of the night.
(scene change, Riff Raff being whipped)
Riff Raff Owwwwwwwww!
Mercy!
(Being whipped by Frank)
Frank How did it happen?
I understand you were to be watching...
Riff Raff I was only away for a minute...
master
Frank Well, see if you can find him on a monitor.
Riff Raff Master, master... we have a visitor.
Brad Hey, Scotty!
Dr. Everett Scott.
Riff Raff You know this earthling
... this person?
Brad Why yes. He happens to be an old friend
of mine.
Frank I see.
So this wasn't simply a chance meeting.
You came here with a purpose.
Brad I told you, my car broke down. I was telling
the truth.
Frank I know what you told me, Brad...
But this Dr. Everett Scott,
his name is not unknown to me.
Brad He was a science teacher at Denton High School.
Frank And now he works for your government, doesn't he, Brad?
He's attached
to the bureau of investigation of that which
you call UFO's!!!
Isn't that right, Brad?
Brad He might be... I don't know.
Riff Raff The intruder is entering the building, master.
Frank He'll probably be...
entering the Zen room.
Shall we inquire of him in person?
(Pause)
(When Dr. Scott passes through Columbia and Magenta's room)
Brad Great Scott!
Dr. Scott Frankenfurter,
we meet at last.
Brad Dr. Scott!
Dr. Scott Brad! What are you doing here?
Frank Don't play games, Dr. Scott.
You know perfectly well what Brad Majors is doing here.
It was part of your plan, was it not?
That he and his female
could check the layout for you.
Well, unfortunately for you all,
the plans are to be changed.
You must be adaptable, Dr. Scott;
I know Brad is.
Dr. Scott I can assure you that Brad's presence here comes as a
complete surprise to me.
I came here to find
Eddie.
Brad Eddie! I've seen him!
Frank Eddie! What do you know of Eddie, Dr. Scott?
Dr. Scott I happen to know a great deal about a lot of things.
You see, Eddie happens to be my nephew.
(Frank gasps and releases the magnet. Dr. Scott rolls back
a couple feet)
(Janet orgasms)
Brad Dr. Scott.
Janet Ah!
Dr. Scott Janet!
Janet Dr. Scott!
Brad Janet!
Janet Brad!
Frank Rocky!
(Rocky flips his head toward Frank)
Dr. Scott Janet!
Janet Dr. Scott!
Brad Janet!
Janet Brad!
Frank Rocky!
(Rocky looks at Frank with quickly lessening interest)
Dr. Scott Janet!
Janet Dr. Scott!
Brad Janet!
Janet Brad!
Frank Rocky!
(Rocky once again gleams at Frank, getting very upset)
Frank Listen... I made you... and I can break you just as easily.
(to Rocky)
Magenta (Rings gong) Master, dinner is prepared!
Frank Excellent.
Under the circumstances, formal dress is to be
optional.
Narrator Food has always played a vital role in Life's rituals.
The breaking of bread, the last meal
of the condemned man,
and now... this meal.
However informal it might appear,
you can be sure that there was to be little bonhomie.
(Riff Raff and Magenta wheel in a cart)
(Riff Raff opens the lid)
(Riff Raff places a large piece of meat in front of Frank)
(He carves the meat)
(and Riff Raff serves it to the others)
(Riff Raff pours and spills wine before this)
Frank A toast ...to absent friends...
All To absent friends.
Frank And to Rocky.
(Frank starts a verse of staccato »Happy Birthday Rocky«
and cuts it off after »Dear Rocky.« Janet continues until
she realizes she is the only one left singing.)
Shall we?
Dr. Scott We came here to discuss Eddie.
Columbia Eddie! (Frank threatens her with the slicer)
Frank That's a rather tender subject.
Another slice anyone?
Columbia Excuse me. (Exits room, closes door behind her, and screams)
Dr. Scott (to camera) I knew he was in with a bad crowd, but is was
worst than I imagined... Aliens!
Rocky Ugh?
Brad Doctor Scott!
Frank Go on, Dr. Scott.
Or should I say Dr. Von Scott.
Brad Just what exactly are you implying?
Dr. Scott It's all right!
Brad Doctor Scott!
Dr. Scott It's all right, Brad
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