I want to die, I'm bored with life.
i want to die, i'm bored with life, this world has nothing for me, and eternal life is like hell for me, i'm in no pain, i'm bored not motivated, i have no goals, i spent the last 2 years trying to find god but i can't he doesn't exist for me, i believe that this world is all, and i can't be bothered to make an effort at this life of mine, so my life isn't quite fair, it might be better tomorrow i just want to laugh again, but then why bother, who cares? and don't tell me jesus cares, i don't beleive he existed maybe u can help me if so that's great u probably can't oh well, i've been suicidal for 4 years? why haven't i done it? maybe i won't, but i feel that as my life goes down and down i just can't be bothered, if someone tried to kill me would i stop them? probably not, oh well whatever i just need to get this stuff out, i feel a bit better thanks, who knows i may live on
Thanks for writing me, although I am not sure why you did. You know that I am a Christian yet you write me and tell me not to tell you that Jesus loves you, sorry but I can't do that because He does love you. Just because you don't want to believe in Him does not mean that He does not love you. If I tell my child not to touch the stove because it is hot and my child says I don't believe you and touches the stove, does that mean my child won't get burned? Of course not, neither does it matter whether you believe in God or not, He still exists and He still loves you. Yet it does matter whether you believe or not, because that is what determines where you will spend eternity.
You said maybe I can convince you that Jesus really did live. I doubt that I can. If you don't believe all the evidence around you then why would you believe me? Let me just ask you a couple of questions. Can you prove that Hitler lived? Have you ever spoken to someone who saw him? Have you ever spoken to anyone who touched him? Yet, I bet you believe he was a real person, right? Why is that?
Is it because you were taught that he lived? Is it because of history? Well guess what, there is more evidence that Jesus walked this earth then there is that Hitler did. The Romans kept some very good records and Jesus' is mentioned in a lot of them. Plus look what His life caused to happen; a new religion which has touched the whole world. The Romans kept good records of what happened to most of His disciples too. Most of them died because of what they believed. Instead of renouncing that Jesus was who He said He was they died claiming He was in fact who He said He was; the Son of God.
You know people also claim that the holocaust did not happen. Go figure... But that is my point, if you can't prove that Hitler lived yet you believe it, then why should you off hand disbelieve that Jesus lived?
It is the same with evolution, it can't be proven but that does not stop people from believing it. They believe it for one reason, because if they don't believe it then they would have to admit that there is a God who created them and all we know. Why won't they admit that? Well it comes down to not wanting to answer to God. See if they admit there is a God then they know they will someday have to answer to Him for everything they have done. That is a scary thought.
Scary that is unless you take the free gift that God has offered you. You see we are all under a death sentence for what we have done. Not one of us is innocent, we have all sinned and therefore are under judgment. God loves us but He is holy and cannot stand to be around anyone who is a sinner. His holy nature demands that we die for our sins. So what is He to do? Should He just quit loving us or what? Well He did not stop loving us, He provided a way for us to get out of the death sentence we all deserve. (Romans 3:22b-23 NRSV) For there is no distinction, {23} since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God... (Romans 5:8 NIV) But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
God loves us enough to give us the choice to either accept Jesus as our Savior or to reject Him, but for those who reject Him there is eternity in hell separated from God. You said you are bored, well at least hell won't be boring, but it won't be fun either. It will be terrible and it will be final. The moment you die you will know for sure that there is a God and that you rejected Him, but it will be too late. Don't let that happen.
You said you spent the past two years trying to find God but He does not exist for you. Where were you looking? Were you looking for a genie in the sky to make you happy, or were you looking for God so you could have a relationship with Him and serve Him? God will be found by those who are looking for the right reasons. He won't be found by those who search for their own selfish reasons.
It is up to you. God loves you but He won't force Himself on you either. He wants you to love Him but it has to be because you want to, not because someone told you that you have to. People often claim that I force my religion on people, but the stupid thing is that I can't, because God won't accept anyone who does not come to Him voluntarily.
I will pray for you. I will pray that you will open your eyes and understand.
Ralph
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